“I don't trust people who don't love themselves and tell me, 'I love you.' ... There is an African saying which is: Be careful when a naked person offers you a shirt.” ― Maya Angelou “When you assume your worth, you will value others more.” --Danielle LaPorte Historically, (and subconsciously), I chose to work and hang with people who eventually let me down in one way or another. They didn’t show up on time. They didn’t do what they said they would do. They were loose with their words. And they were full of excuses. When I consciously decided to choose people who did show up, who stood behind their words, and who took responsibility… who, by the way, also seemed to have luck on their side… I realized that it would mean that I, too, would have to show up, be impeccable with my word and take responsibility. While we might like to see ourselves as having these qualities, we know there is a lot more work to do. And rising to this level can feel very scary, perhaps because most people are more afraid of success than failure. Something to do with deserving great things for ourselves… So something holds us back, causing us to be late, to break our commitments and to tell someone we will get together and not follow up. And in those moments where we feel somewhat elevated picking out faults in others, the truth is, we are projecting our own feelings of self-worth, or lack of. To love ourselves enough to be kind, reliable and constant is assuming our worth. Living by your own inner compass without apology and with compassion and respect for others, no matter where they are on their journey, is assuming our worth. Don't be the naked person offering a shirt. We all have some work to do, and as they say, it's an inside job. What, then, of our external world? As we transform, it will transform itself on its own. Love, Savitree
2 Comments
Theresa
1/16/2016 09:17:30 am
Well said!! I know my inconsistent ability to set boundaries with my time and resources has made it difficult to be kind, reliable and constant to myself....which obviously leads to exhaustion and depletion of my self worth. I can see that this could eventually lead to me being "the naked person offering my shirt."
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1/19/2016 02:21:50 pm
Thanks, Theresa! Your share reminds me of a Zen proverb that says, "You should sit in meditation for twenty minutes every day... unless you’re too busy. Then you should sit for an hour.” I know what you mean when you say you will start [setting boundaries] after you catch up. I realized not too long ago that I will never actually be "caught up" until something else changes, and my practice has been that something else. Explaining how this shift even happens doesn't make logical sense, so it does require some trust in the process, but the experience definitely supports the validity in the proverb.
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